I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
We just shotgunned beers for America
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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