so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
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