I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
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No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
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I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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