He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
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Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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