I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
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