I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize