I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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