Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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