In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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