its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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