My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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