Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
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