talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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