just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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