the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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