Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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