My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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