I think I died a long time ago.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize