Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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