I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
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She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
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When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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