i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize