I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize