if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize