white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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