chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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