Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize