K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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