those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize