"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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