i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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