did you get engaged???
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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