i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
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