you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to swaddle you in tequila
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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