i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize