Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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