she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize