Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's always time for handjobs
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize