So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize