feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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