I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize