So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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