Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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