Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize