I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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