And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
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