It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize