we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He felt like a one man threesome
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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