I hate all girls vehemently.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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