My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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