"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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